"To Live Like You Were Dieing"

There is a radio show that I love listening to in the evening time. It plays mostly love songs. Tonight it played a country song titled "To Live like you were dieing" I was sitting in the car on the way home from church listening to it. The story of the song is about a man who has found out he has cancer and someone ask him what he did when he found out. He said he went sky diving, rocket mountain climbing, he went on to list several things that were crazy and wild. Then at the end he says "I hope one day you can live like you were dieing." Well this got me to thinking about what would be my list as a christian if I knew for a fact that I have a number of days to live?
There are plenty of things that I would love to do. But are virtually unimportant. I started going over those in my mind, I would love to go see the rolling hills of Scotland, visit Ireland, swim with Dolphins, and then I thought is that really how I would spend my last days before I met the King of Kings face to face??? I sure hope not!!!!!! I would want to go around and tell everyone about Him! To make sure I had nothing with anyone that I had not asked forgiveness. To make sure that everyone I loved knew I loved them. To make sure that I spent my last days for HIM! But oh my goodness what is stopping me from doing all those things now? I don't know when I will take my last breath. I don't know when I say goodbye to people if I will see them again or not. The Bible tells me that anyone I pass and do not tell about Him their blood is on my hands. WHy do I not live today, this moment as if it is my very last one.
I have been thinking alot lately to live purposfully. WHich means every action, every word, every breath is thought out on how it will glorify HIM! My very life is HIS. So why do I continue to live as if it's mine? I will start eating for Him, I will start talking for HIM, I will start living as if i'm dieing because after all I am.....

Suffering

It seems this has been a topic in my life lately. We talked about it last Friday at the Friday morning Bible study I attend. My husband preached on it to the youth last night at youth group. I feel as though i'm suffering right now. I realize that I'm not really suffering just going through some discomfort but I would really love to throw myself a pity party about it right now. My hip is hurting me so bad right along with my back. But oh well soooo not the point of this post. Anyways..... Our conversation at Bible study was about our reaction to suffering.... Do we call on the Lord more in the midst of our suffering? Is that the only reason at all we call on Him? Do we only ask for help or do we praise Him for it? Do we whine and complain about it while we are going through it, or do we "man up" and just focus on getting through it?
I try very hard to have a "praying without ceasing" relationship with Christ. I talk to him almost all the time. I'm constantly talking to Him in my head. I love that we can do that with Christ talk to Him about the random things that no one else really cares about. But I do have to admit my prayers get much deeper when i'm going through a crisis. I want to change that I want to have deep prayers with Him constantly.
Praising Him in the midst of the storm is something I am learning to do. It is coming with each trial I go through. I think the reason is, I have seen Him so much in my life use the trials for His greater good. Seen Him grow me, seen Him grow others, seen huge blessings come through the little bit of suffering I have gone through. I use the word suffering here very loosely. I really don't consider the trials I have gone through in this life as suffering. There are many, many people that have experienced suffering in the worst of its form. For those people I pray and will continue to pray that they will have strength and even in the midst of it they will see God working and loving them.
I just want to take every oportunity that He gives me in this life to grow closer to Him. I guess what I'm trying to say is that suffering is a necessary part of this life. I believe it makes us long for heaven all the more. Makes us long for His glory. O how I long for the day when all the suffering will be no more, when all the tears will be wiped away. O MY! Think about that! His hand wiping away your tears! It takes my breath away....

Random Thoughts.....

I have had so much on my mind lately. So much is going on in my life and yet I feel like I lead such a boring one. School has begun yet again for us, so that means my days should be full and active and yet Sunday I hurt my hip and back and have only been able to lay on the sofa doing nothing! Ugh dont' like this at all.
But the real things that I have been pondering, contemplating is my life and walk with Christ. I need HIM, I crave HIM!!! The older I get the more I realize that. The thought that is constantly nagging me is "I want my kids to need HIM to crave HIM!" I want it to be their hearts desire. So i'm constantly tortured with "Am I doing this parenting thing correctly? Am I doing it the way He planned for me to?" I so desperatly want to please Him, to make HIM proud of me that I'm constanly thinking about it. The good thing is about that is that it has made me so much more aware of my actions, my thoughts, my words. Sorry I know this is taking a very random way about it. I will post more tomorrow....